If you want to stretch your retirement saving or save more money for retirement, you might want to take a closer look at how much you're spending on your adult children. If you are spending too much, you may wonder how you can stop supporting your adult children.
Recent studies show that parents, especially those earning low incomes or living from paycheck to paycheck, are spending more money on their grown kids than what they're saving for retirement. And most of this aid goes to expenses like weddings, groceries and cell phone bills.
We understand that cutting the money cord can be extremely difficult if you're watching your child struggle financially. But if you're jeopardizing your financial security, it's wise to reduce or eliminate the funding. If you stop supporting your adult children, you will be able to better take care of your own financial costs.
Many parents have thought about it. But most of them haven't found the right way to do so without feeling bad. If you're one of them, you're in the right place.
In this blog post, we share the best tips to handle this step from successful parents and financial experts.
Learn To Let Go
In order to stop supporting your adult children, you need to learn to let go. Experts say that some parents find it difficult to put up financial boundaries with their children because they're too attached to them. And this makes their adult kids remain financially dependent on them for far too long.
Although you may mean the best by supporting your kids financially, it can prevent you from enjoying your retirement years. It can also stop you from saving enough money for future healthcare costs. But it's not too late.
Learn to let your adult kid go. That way, you help them become financially healthy and self-reliant adults.
This is key when you want to try to stop supporting your adult children. Make a plan to reduce financial assistance. And while at it, don't cut the money cord too quickly.
Before talking to your adult kid about it, take a moment to think through. If you're co-parenting, talk with your partner about withdrawing that support.
Keep in mind that no matter how much money you're giving your child every month, it's prudent to give them time to prepare for the change. For example, if you're giving them hundreds of dollars a month, you might want to give them a two-month notice.
Ideally, your kid should be in a better financial place by the time you pull the plug. So during that grace period…
Help Them Get A Part-Time Or Better Paying Job
If your child lives from paycheck to paycheck, encourage them to get a part-time job or a side gig to boost their income. Find some healthy ways to help them through the process.
For instance, guide them through the hiring process, share your experiences with them, and use your networks to help them get a job.
When helping, don't do anything unethical. Also, don't "get the job" for them. As mentioned earlier, learn to let them fight some battles on their own. They get to learn to be independent and will thank you later for it.
Have Honest Conversations
Once you have your plan in place, it's time to have an honest conversation with your children. Find the best way and time to do this. Perhaps it's best to talk in person rather than on the phone.
Clearly explain to your kids that this is not a punishment, but a way of helping them learn to be independent financially. Tell them you're proud of what they have accomplished so far and you believe they can support themselves financially.
Sometimes, kids just need some reassurance and a little push to make them realize their full potential. And in any case, most kids don't like their parents to support them completely.
Support In Other Ways
Cutting financial support doesn't mean it's the end of the road between you and your child. Let your children now that you're still there for them in other ways. Assure them that you're willing to support them emotionally, in strategizing ways to increase their income, and so much more.
Reducing financial support you're giving your adult children is not easy but necessary if you're struggling financially. We hope these tips will help you focus on your retirement and help your kid become self-reliant and independent financially.
What About You?
How did you stop supporting your adult children if you were? What other strategies, secrets, or ideas did you use?